Yee’s

我是爛事王這件事情大家都知道，但下面說的事情可以排上前幾名而且從此拒用carefree的棉條

簡短一句話就是棉條的引繩神秘消失然後我自己撈不出來

事情發生的緊急，老闆要上飛機我還在廁所裡面奮鬥。還好同事提早進city carry 我了一下，反正我弄到自己快往生只好打電話給還開的診所尋求協助。

嗨，那個，我知道你們快關門了，但可以等一下嗎？我的衛生棉條不小心塞在裡面拿不出來，你們可以協助我嗎？

我在大街上小聲地說著上面的話，實在太過丟臉。還好獲得了肯定的答案，只好急匆匆地找到診所，深怕自己會因為拔不出的棉條而生病。

護士A：（笑）
護士B：（笑）
我：你們都知道了吧，不要笑啦很可怕誒！！！（以下省略8000字抱怨。
護士B ：那妳是買到哪家的棉條啊？
我：我……，我忘了。
護士AB（狂笑）
我：（撈口袋）喔喔我有一個，是carefree的！！！！
護士A： （繼續狂笑）

醫生出來之後我有點失望，其實我有幻想如果是個很帥的年輕男醫生我該怎麼辦，結果是個中年的亞裔好爸爸於是我跟從我發現東西卡住開始陪伴的K友人

誒，好希望是帥哥幫我拿出來。要是是個帥哥我就不拿出來了嗚嗚嗚。或是可以放別的進去XDDD

在護士的協助下我躺上手術檯、張開雙腿，我覺得害羞又緊張，畢竟從來沒有這樣過。醫生走了進來，坐在我看不到的地方（請想像就像生產的時候的樣子），我的緊張程度呈現指數型飆漲。但很突然的一個瞬間，波！，不到1分鐘醫生就完成了夾出棉條的任務。

而棉條離開我的瞬間，該怎麼說，我覺得人生重見光明。中年好爸爸對我說：「還好你遇到我，不然其他醫生會把你送進醫院，我還蠻常處理這類型的事情的。」我笑而不語，不想知道醫生豐富的經驗是從哪裡來的。我們就姑且相信大家都是找不到棉條的線吧。

友人K說：恭喜你生了寶寶
護士A說：等你生寶寶之後就可以說這不是第一遭

我不想對這件事情再做過多的評論，畢竟荒謬程度已經超乎想像。以往的新聞都是小黃瓜等等不該塞的東西拔不出來，我從來不相信這種事情會發生在自己身上，結果他發生了，而且還是再尋常不過的衛生棉條。

這件爛事花了我保險公司100，我自己$40，Receipt 上面註明的是remove foreign body ( including eye)，我覺得可以裱框放起來。

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There are plenty, plenty of crazy incidents happened on me which they were never, never considered to become my life experience. They already can be listed and ranked, the one I’m bought to say can be certain as top 3.

To be short, it a story about a tampon stocking in my vagina.

It was a rush afternoon, I went to toilet for taking out tampon while my my boss was covering my shift. I had to be hurry because her flight was scheduled it’s just around the corner.

You can’t make it if rushing it, it’s an old saying which coming true at the very wrong time. Sadly I couldn’t find out the string which was made for pulling out tampons. I tried so many times but it was no where to be fund. I had to try aother strategy by pinching the tampon itself out but still failed. I was both desperate and embarrassed. I called my boss and explained it, fortunately my colleague came in town early, saving us from closing a bit time.

I called a clinic for help, the conversation was really shameful. “Hello, I… I know you’re closing but I really need help…… I’m calling for taking tampon out of my vagina. Is it okay? Or should I seek for hospital emergency room?” I could really feel the woman on the other side trying to hold back her laugh and replying me “it’s fine, just come in!”

The receptions were already waiting for me and their faces were coving with big smile. I could only mocking myself for getting away from the awkwardness.

Ever since the incident happened, I started chatting with my friend K. We talked something dirty like “ how would you do if the doctor is cute? He’s going to take something out of you.” “ I would invite him to put other things in.” That it, I was kind of excited to meet the doctor. However, unfortunately when the doctor came out from the clinic room, it was a middle-age Asian man, which was far far away from our fantasy.

The nurse helped me getting ready on the chair. My legs were widely spared and my heart beats were pounding rapidly. The doctor came in after we’re ready, There’s an strange feeling of some cold-metal clips went into my body, I thought it would take long but only 3 seconds, after an bubble sounds I heard the doctor said “it’s all done!”

He smiled at me and said he was experienced at taking things out from vagina, also I’m lucky enough to get his help because other young doctors would only send me to hospital. I wasn’t going to comment about his well experienced statement, just wanted to get out of that clinic as soon as possible. After all I paid $40 myself and the insurance covered $100 for this ridiculous, also had a receipt of noting “remove foreign-body”.

What a day…